Tens of thousands of petitions are submitted to the UK government every year in the hope they will be discussed in parliament.
But thousands of ludicrous petitions are thrown out – ranging from Arsenal FC to be abolished to making Jeremy Clarkson the Prime Minister.
Petitions are debated in parliament if they get 100,000 signatures. Among recent issues to reach that threshold and be discussed in parliament were banning animal testing and making it illegal to lie in Parliament.
Unsurprisingly, the government doesn’t always take e-petitions seriously – and they are thrown out by the petitions committee.
One reads: “The government should tell the truth about Santa thus alleviating some of the pain when children find out.”
The petitions committee responded: “We think you started this petition as a joke.”
Some petitions are thrown out because they fall outside the government’s remit.
One of those was: “Put Shrek back on Netflix.”
Another petitioner wanted the government to step in to get One Direction back together.
One asked for “a day off on your birthday or double pay” and another called to “Make Freddos 10p again.”
The petition’s committee replied to all saying they were rejected.
Some sports fans love a strange petition.
Ten people signed a petition asking for Fat Les’ “Vindaloo” to replace England’s national anthem.
Another person, thinking more small-scale, said: “I would like a small football pitch made near my house to play with my friends.”
One Wigan rugby fan said: “Leigh rufc to win cup because all the other teams are awful up the Leigh u15s.”
Elsewhere in Greater Manchester, one petitioner said: “Allow horses to be rided at Manchester or anywhere in UK”.
Anyone fancy swerving round a pony on Deansgate?
Twenty-one people want Royal Navy servicemen be allowed to sport mullets and moustaches.
“It is discrimination males are not allowed long hair or cool facial hair.”
Featured image: Jeremy Clarkson, Top Gear Live 2012. Copyright Petr Margera and licensed for reuse under this Creative Commons Licence
